There's been a bit of an uproar in military wives circles over this article, "My Soldier is Leaving Me, Again." Firstly, yes she was and has acknowledged her faux pas in calling time at Fort Leavenworth a deployment. However, She's a Major's wife, so I expect her to be a little crazy. From day one of my journey with my career officer husband, my observation was that the major's wives were always a little crazy. Now in the prime of our lives I still can't quite pin point exactly what it is that drives us Major's wives nuts, but I'm not going to sweat it because thankfully, I've also observed that promotion to Colonel seems to straighten the wives out. The reason for that seems so much more obvious; there's a light at the end of the tunnel. Whatever craziness she's suffering from will soon be near over and anyone can hang in there long enough to cash in that retirement check.
In all honesty I can sympathize with Knadler. Over the last several years I've been living the pseudo-civilian life style. Being a homeowner too, we're deeply wedded to the house. Having a mortgage payment to consider does change the logistics of a 10 month assignment to Leavenworth. If we were looking at that assignment I would probably have to opt for shipping my dear husband off unaccompanied as well (but we'd definitely go visit a lot!) Why, well because moving out of our house and finding a tenant for just 10 months seems to me a very dicey proposition. In all likelihood she doesn't have 10 months worth of mortgage payments banked up for that long of an extended vacation. I know I sure don't. If I did, I'd probably spend it on something else (like braces, or school tuition, new windows, or a heating oil to gas conversion). So I may be one of the few who gets why she doesn't want to move to Leavenworth for less than a year.
For sure it's easier to live in base housing and never have to worry about a mortgage, flood insurance, paying for home repairs, or finding a responsible tenant. Housing tends to be very cookie cutter, and close quartered. All the walls are white so your things will blend in well everywhere you go. It's an ideal situation for very extraverted families who thrive on socializing over the short fences and communal living spaces. Many love this life style and the close friendships they build living in this setting. Unfortunately, retirement or end of time served (ETS) will come one day and they will have to leave base housing at some point. Perhaps this is why I'm see so many advertisements for retired military communities promising many of the same life style opportunities of on post housing, but in the real world. There's certainly a market for that!
But on the flip side, we're not terribly extraverted. In fact, dare I say it, we're kind of introverted. Having lived in quarters and been there done that living on post, I'm living out my life long dream of home ownership. Growing up in various rental apartments gave me a yearning for a place I could call mine. Yes, buying a house is a lifestyle choice. It's not without risks, but there can be rewards as well. Today I picked out this really lovely tile for my kitchen that reminds me of the beautiful Potomac River. My walls are green, yellow, blue, and peach (though I'm planning on changing the peach). Instead of relying upon some housing office, I control the quality of repairs and improvements to my abode. When I Hated the carpet in the kids room we ripped it out. There was flower wall paper in the boys room it went bye bye! We needed a serious security solution for household cleaners so we installed a real lock on a cabinet in the laundry room. A fence for the dog, so we built one. An arbor for the grape vine, done. Fruit trees, planted. Discovered poisonous bushes, tore them out and replaced them with roses. Kid puts a dent or hole in the wall, bust out the quick patch...and so it goes. If we need to change something we don't need to ask permission from anyone to do so.
Yes, we'll have to PCS one day, and I hope to provide a lovely rental home for someone who doesn't want to wait 6months to a year for post housing.
To each, his own, enough said.
Thursday, June 26, 2014
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
Inflammation
After reading the latest confusing article about a study looking at the correlation of the mother's place of birth in relation to the risk of the child being diagnosed with autism I noticed a lot of the suggested articles had something in common. All the correlating ailments are inflammatory diseases. Mom's with lupus are more likely to have a child with autism. Maternal infection is more likely to yield a child with autism...
There's the latest thing about maternal exposure to agricultural pesticides and autism. And the oldest cause in the book, some say vaccinations (which cause inflammatory responses) might cause autism. Meanwhile on the other side of that heated debate folks point out that those who suffer and survive all those dangerous (inflammatory response generating) diseases are often left impaired, which similar to autism, is neurological impairments (some would say damage and others would say, differences, depending upon your persuasion).
I suspect anytime the immune system (which is inflammation) is kicking into gear the chances are going to go up. There's no easy pin point cause here. It's a spectrum because it's a catch all diagnosis...in my opinion.
There's the latest thing about maternal exposure to agricultural pesticides and autism. And the oldest cause in the book, some say vaccinations (which cause inflammatory responses) might cause autism. Meanwhile on the other side of that heated debate folks point out that those who suffer and survive all those dangerous (inflammatory response generating) diseases are often left impaired, which similar to autism, is neurological impairments (some would say damage and others would say, differences, depending upon your persuasion).
I suspect anytime the immune system (which is inflammation) is kicking into gear the chances are going to go up. There's no easy pin point cause here. It's a spectrum because it's a catch all diagnosis...in my opinion.
Sunday, June 15, 2014
Where to find 1960's retro pink tile...
After bleaching the sheet rock wall a couple times and coming to the realization that we'd probably have to spend far more than I'm prepared to do, and when my husband began to research tiling, we determined that perhaps we could just patch up the bathroom wall.
First my thought was to just find something complementing and ornate to fill into the hole, which is almost centered. Then I happened upon a blog post about vintage pink tiles, which gave me hope that I could just find matching tiles (I never even dreamed that was possible). Now, I'm crossing my fingers that Tile World will have my tile, and that we can salvage our bathroom and put this whole nightmare behind us.
Meanwhile, our master bedroom has crown molding all the way around the ceiling now! I'm hoping that in a few days I'll be putting the final touches on those walls and crossing that long over due project off the list.
First my thought was to just find something complementing and ornate to fill into the hole, which is almost centered. Then I happened upon a blog post about vintage pink tiles, which gave me hope that I could just find matching tiles (I never even dreamed that was possible). Now, I'm crossing my fingers that Tile World will have my tile, and that we can salvage our bathroom and put this whole nightmare behind us.
Meanwhile, our master bedroom has crown molding all the way around the ceiling now! I'm hoping that in a few days I'll be putting the final touches on those walls and crossing that long over due project off the list.
Saturday, June 14, 2014
The Decline of Play and Rise of Mental Disorders: Peter Gray at TEDxNave...
I struggle with this big time! While I want to let the kids play unhindered, I always feel like I would be taking a risk by not directly supervising...like if I don't watch them like a hawk and someone gets hurt or we need to go to the ER for stitches or a broken bone, I'll wind up with CPS at my door. I'm afraid to allow my children to play by themselves. All the stories in the news these days is having an effect for sure, but the side affect is that allowing the children to play becomes a risk instead of a essential developmental necessity. It's wrong. We do need to let the children play. It won't get any better until courts and legislatures acknowledge and respect the need for children to play too.
Thursday, June 12, 2014
Slow but steady
A new fridge has been ordered, but we don't know when it will be available for delivery. We were able to reserve one the factory has designated for our area, but there's no shipping schedule as of yet....but at least we've found one with good reviews, that was made in the USA, and will fit inside our current parameters. Each time we open our current fridge and something falls out someone usually says, "I can't wait for the new fridge to arrive!"
The drywall nail pops in the master bedroom have been repaired, patched, and panted. Perhaps the most monumental task has begun; that of completing the crown molding in this room. When we bought this house, the master bedroom had been divided into two smaller rooms (I have no idea why anyone would do this). After we removed the wall, half the room had crown molding and the other half was unfinished. Three years ago I painted the whole room with the first coat of green before life caught up with us, company came into town, and family events pressed us to move on without finishing up our bedroom. Crown molding isn't easy. While it's not a perfect match (the new and the old pieces are just a little bit differently sized) I'm so excited to see this task finally underway.
I have grand visions of crown molding in all the bedrooms...every room in the house (currently 5 rooms have molding...so why stop there), but the dear husband is not enjoying this. I might have to just do it myself, so I'm paying very close attention and might have to recruit my really tall children to help me later.
The drywall nail pops in the master bedroom have been repaired, patched, and panted. Perhaps the most monumental task has begun; that of completing the crown molding in this room. When we bought this house, the master bedroom had been divided into two smaller rooms (I have no idea why anyone would do this). After we removed the wall, half the room had crown molding and the other half was unfinished. Three years ago I painted the whole room with the first coat of green before life caught up with us, company came into town, and family events pressed us to move on without finishing up our bedroom. Crown molding isn't easy. While it's not a perfect match (the new and the old pieces are just a little bit differently sized) I'm so excited to see this task finally underway. I have grand visions of crown molding in all the bedrooms...every room in the house (currently 5 rooms have molding...so why stop there), but the dear husband is not enjoying this. I might have to just do it myself, so I'm paying very close attention and might have to recruit my really tall children to help me later.
Wednesday, June 11, 2014
I lament for Mosul today
The news from Iraq has been very disappointing on a deeply personal level. My family sacrificed a whole year of separation and my husband missed his third child's birth while deployed to Mosul. He met very brave people who wanted to make their country a better place, some even had notions of attracting tourist to the region, also famous for being the very same Nineveh from the Bible. Jonah was sent by God to tell the people to repent and change their ways and up till recently decedents from the Ninehvites (known as Chaldeans) called Mosul their ancestral land.
I always felt like that year had been worth it, if somehow peace came to the region. So it's a bitter disappointment to see all the hard work, resources, and sacrifices have gone to waste.
To add insult to injury the news that Tikrit has also fallen to the enemy (those that only wish to harm and inflict evil) is also personal, as this is where he was during his first deployment when he missed our second child's birth.
While I suppose most Americans won't have any personal connections to Iraq, and thus might not feel as compelled to care.... I can't help but feel like we've let down the good people and left them to die at the hands of the wicked.
No, I don't want these deployments and wars to go on indefinitely, but one has to wonder if we've done a grave disservice in leaving them to this fate.
I always felt like that year had been worth it, if somehow peace came to the region. So it's a bitter disappointment to see all the hard work, resources, and sacrifices have gone to waste.
To add insult to injury the news that Tikrit has also fallen to the enemy (those that only wish to harm and inflict evil) is also personal, as this is where he was during his first deployment when he missed our second child's birth.
While I suppose most Americans won't have any personal connections to Iraq, and thus might not feel as compelled to care.... I can't help but feel like we've let down the good people and left them to die at the hands of the wicked.
No, I don't want these deployments and wars to go on indefinitely, but one has to wonder if we've done a grave disservice in leaving them to this fate.
Monday, June 9, 2014
The Money pit
Perhaps it's a bit of an exaggeration, but our feelings towards our home lately can be wrapped up in the moniquere (sp?), The Money Pit. We wish we could put it on the market right now and walk away...except then someone would have to take it off our hands and we'd have to find a new place to live. Perhaps we should have sold and PCSed last year instead of extending, but we have liked living here and wanted to stay. As it is now I feel we're just getting deeper into maintenance issues and the longer we're here the more at risk we'll be.
What I wouldn't give to feel like I did last year. How accomplished I felt when we replaced the roof with the architectural styled energy star asphalt shingles then paid in full. We'd made such a big improvement! This year I had envisioned installing as many new windows as we could afford with our tax return. While it was disappointing to learn that window replacement is even more costly then a roof, it wasn't hard to resign ourselves that perhaps it would take two years to accomplish this much needed update. Of course the bathroom tile falling off the wall required the window project take a sabbatical and ever since things have been dropping like flies... if the house had feelings I'd say that many things are jealous of the new roof and have decided to pitch a fit and demand our immediate attention.
The numerous detours are making it hard to get anything done, as I try my best to prioritize the most essential jobs on the list. Our focus has been on collecting quotes for the bathroom, and while we've had two separate folks over to measure, no one, as of yet has provided an actual quote for the work. They don't like to quote you anything till you've gone to the painstaking process of picking out tile, which is difficult when you're not sure how much they're planning to charge. In selecting materials I've gleaned that porcelain is best for bathrooms, as ceramic has to be sealed to be non-porous (otherwise it lets water seep in). White grout is bad...darker grout is better.
Meanwhile, the kitchen floor gaps allow water into the subflooring everyday (spills are routine around here), and we have a refrigeration problem... not enough working space in the fridge upstairs....To add insult to injury, a couple days ago the extra fridge downstairs is broke.
We've needed a bigger fridge, but the space upstairs will only allow 33" wide. Ironically, narrower fridges are more expensive, so it galls me that I'm having to pay $$$s more for a smaller fridge when I need more space. We removed the cabinet above the fridge to allow additional height and expand our choices a wee bit more. I thought I'd found one that would work well, only to find delivery of that particular model isn't available to our area (why the heck not I have no clue). The only fridges available have awful reviews...and cost more. And then we'll have to find a way to make up for the missing cabinet.
Today we spent hours at Home Depot trying to get the quote from our bathroom project. The way they're working it up is entirely confusing and ridiculous...and did I mention they charged us $35 just to come measure! Long story short, they wanted to charge us another $45 to measure our bathtub, even though I have the measurements and specifications already... (no I'm not keeping the 1966 enameled PINK tub)......Everyone looks at me like I'm crazy for wanting to replace this tub. After wasting our entire afternoon in the store someone finally refered us to a different Home Depot service that could appraise all the work for the bathroom for free! So all that wasted time and we still do not have a quote and have to endure another Home Depot measuring appointment. I just want to know if I can afford it or not. A third company is coming tomorrow morning... lets hope someone can give us a clue as to how much this is going to run.
What I wouldn't give to feel like I did last year. How accomplished I felt when we replaced the roof with the architectural styled energy star asphalt shingles then paid in full. We'd made such a big improvement! This year I had envisioned installing as many new windows as we could afford with our tax return. While it was disappointing to learn that window replacement is even more costly then a roof, it wasn't hard to resign ourselves that perhaps it would take two years to accomplish this much needed update. Of course the bathroom tile falling off the wall required the window project take a sabbatical and ever since things have been dropping like flies... if the house had feelings I'd say that many things are jealous of the new roof and have decided to pitch a fit and demand our immediate attention.
The numerous detours are making it hard to get anything done, as I try my best to prioritize the most essential jobs on the list. Our focus has been on collecting quotes for the bathroom, and while we've had two separate folks over to measure, no one, as of yet has provided an actual quote for the work. They don't like to quote you anything till you've gone to the painstaking process of picking out tile, which is difficult when you're not sure how much they're planning to charge. In selecting materials I've gleaned that porcelain is best for bathrooms, as ceramic has to be sealed to be non-porous (otherwise it lets water seep in). White grout is bad...darker grout is better.
Meanwhile, the kitchen floor gaps allow water into the subflooring everyday (spills are routine around here), and we have a refrigeration problem... not enough working space in the fridge upstairs....To add insult to injury, a couple days ago the extra fridge downstairs is broke.
We've needed a bigger fridge, but the space upstairs will only allow 33" wide. Ironically, narrower fridges are more expensive, so it galls me that I'm having to pay $$$s more for a smaller fridge when I need more space. We removed the cabinet above the fridge to allow additional height and expand our choices a wee bit more. I thought I'd found one that would work well, only to find delivery of that particular model isn't available to our area (why the heck not I have no clue). The only fridges available have awful reviews...and cost more. And then we'll have to find a way to make up for the missing cabinet.
Today we spent hours at Home Depot trying to get the quote from our bathroom project. The way they're working it up is entirely confusing and ridiculous...and did I mention they charged us $35 just to come measure! Long story short, they wanted to charge us another $45 to measure our bathtub, even though I have the measurements and specifications already... (no I'm not keeping the 1966 enameled PINK tub)......Everyone looks at me like I'm crazy for wanting to replace this tub. After wasting our entire afternoon in the store someone finally refered us to a different Home Depot service that could appraise all the work for the bathroom for free! So all that wasted time and we still do not have a quote and have to endure another Home Depot measuring appointment. I just want to know if I can afford it or not. A third company is coming tomorrow morning... lets hope someone can give us a clue as to how much this is going to run.
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