We spend a lot of time devoted to trying to stick to a school work regimen. Of course I have goals, and the drive to accomplish more and more can infringe upon just getting out of the house. Aside form therapy appointments and prescheduled extracurricular classes there's not enough time for anything else. There's just no room in the finite allotment of time. With a special needs child... teenager... they ALWAYS need more time. No matter how much restraint I've used to avoid assigning an unmanageable amount of work, it's always too much work. So we push and push to get everything finished... and we're never.... almost never finished.
And the social life suffers. Not just because of the aforementioned work load, but inhibitions that build up from previous catastrophic socializing failures. Nobody likes to crash and burn repeatedly.
But it gets lonely, and a little maddening.
And this weekend I experienced a disappointment when an incomplete invitation to see friends didn't pan out, followed up by an overwhelming feeling of unworthiness and rejection when the undisclosed event went off without a hitch and without us.
Being a beautiful day, this deep desire to bask in fellowship and the outdoors took hold and controlled the entire day. No formalized lessoned were given, and the kids played vigorously almost all day long. It was recess, homeschooler style, at two intervals for an hour and a half each, two different age groups at different parks; park hopping.
Then one child went to dance class, as split ops facilitated a second child's simultaneous swim class attendance.
Tomorrow we'll return to our regularly scheduled lessons, exactly where we left off... and we'll keep pushing for progress. But next Wednesday we'll make time for play, because it's just as important, if not more important...
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